As the Storm Rolls In

Ooooooh shit.
This rain is some fine stuff.
I'd like to start off by tipping my hat to Bryce, for telling me to take out my earbuds and open a window. He commented on the thunder and I promptly shut down Spotify and cracked my bedroom window.

I'd also like to say that this isn't quite a creative piece, but it's not a blog post either. This blog is quickly transforming into a directionless blob and I'm A O K with it.

I have to break this down into stages a bit, though in real time it hits you all at once.

1. The first wave of thunder was subtle, the second louder. There's a louder crash and I jump a bit.

2. Then the smell hits me. It smells damp. It's about to rain. 

(Usually these little storms fall north of my house, and we don't actually get the rain, just the noise of the storm blowing over. But it smells like we might get some actual rainfall tonight.)

3. It's close. A breeze slips through my window, and I can feel my skin scrunching into goosebumps, the temperature dropping in my room.

4. There's a flash of light in the sky, there and gone.

5. There isn't really a way to describe anticipation, but it's similar to the way you feel when you bite into a hamburger you've been waiting for in a restaurant, so I guess that's where taste plays into this. It sounds like a stretch, but it isn't.

It starts to rain.

The rain starts slow, and speeds up, and the symphony of senses continues through the evening. There was some really close lightning a second ago. It sounded like a hundred fists rapping on a closed metal door, all packed into two seconds of sound, gone before it started.

And that's what it's like. To sit next to your bedroom window at 10:30 pm, in late April, in Eastern Iowa. You're fully aware there are other things you should be doing. But you sit anyway, and you taste and see and smell and hear and feel the storm. Only a few things really appeal to all five of your senses. 

It's a light-up feeling, like you get one the love of your life walks into the same room, and you see them, feel them get closer, smell their shampoo as they slip past you, hear the melodic sound of their voice, and taste the electricity in the air between the two of you.

That's probably straight out of some song on the radio about the electricity of love hitting you like lightning or something, and it makes no sense and perfect sense. 

(Yikes this is an angsty post. I don't even have a thunderstorm love right now, I just want one, I guess.)

Find someone that overwhelms you and brings you peace. Find yourself a thunderstorm love. It can be both at the same time.
Claire

Good Days

So the other day, I told my friend about a comment a boy made, and how it made me smile.

He had said "good morning, Claire." And I was happy about it.

"You're overthinking this way too much, Claire. He just said hi."

Here's a magical thought: I know. And I was happy about it. Let me enjoy this moment, let me live it up for a just a second, and smile about something simple.

I know she didn't mean to, but she sucked the joy out of that moment with a simple comment. When she said that, I promptly shut my mouth, plugged in headphones, and listened to sad Sam Smith music the rest of the class period. And then I listened to Sam Smith every passing time, and during lunch, and I was still sad about that one small moment. I let it ruin my whole day.

That was yesterday.

Today, I woke up in a huff again. Yesterday's bad mood lingered. I skipped the makeup, I didn't even put in lenses. I ALWAYS put in lenses. I put on lazy jeans and a tshirt and embraced the fact that I looked like crap. I did manage to make myself a decent breakfast, but I was running late and upset with my mom and not feeling anything good. It was going to be another mediocre day.

And then, as I'm driving, a really happy song comes on, and I turn on to 42nd street, and the sun hits me right in the chest. Everything was golden. As I drove past the Twin Pines golf course, the grass was golden, and the sun hit it just right. As I squinted into the road ahead, the pavement was tinted yellow-gold. I tried to look past the tree line, and the clouds were backed with an amazing light. And I looked at the golf course again, and glanced back behind me, and the sky was a deep, amazing purple-ish color, and the clouds from what might have been rain were receding behind me. It was beautiful in both directions. I was witnessing a battle between light and dark, and light was winning, and I was headed straight for the bright blazing sun. It was AWESOME. 

Of course, then I turned into the school parking lot and got snapped back to reality a bit. I had a soggy breakfast, a lot of homework, a generally lame day. My friends were grouchy, I was tired, and everything moved in slow motion. That's the overview, I suppose. But the snap back to reality was really only partial. All day, everything I did was backed by a golden glow. That sunlight followed me all day, and even in my windowless classrooms, when I was trapped and stressed and surrounded by boring schoolwork. Through it all, I just thought back to that receding darkness and amazing sunrise and I felt like I was on cloud nine. Even physics didn't suck. I HATE physics. But circuits are fun, and the sunrise is beautiful, and heck, tomorrow is Friday. I can't be upset when it's almost the weekend.

So. What's the purpose of this? I don't know. I was celebrating all day, and I wanted to write something to celebrate that while the feeling lasts. I'm starting to worry about tomorrow because today was so grand. But tomorrow, I just have to find my next sunrise, the backdrop for everything I do that makes me happy no matter what.

Hell, tomorrow's Friday. That's a start.

Happy almost Friday,
Claire
(591)

Google has the answers

As I'm sure many of you do as well, when I'm in a bad mood, or stressed, or tired, or struggling with a decision, I turn to the internet for answers. When I'm tired, I read buzzfeed tips to pull an all-nighter, and it motivates me to wake up. When I'm stressed, I find lists of dumb, simple ways to relax. Yoga, meditation, lighting a candle, breathing exercises. Sometimes, you find yourself overwhelmed. The internet has answers. Well, today, and quite honestly for the last few weeks, I've felt awful. Not like, sick, (WebMD, anyone?) but sad. Not depressed, at least not yet, but really down in the dumps, and not for a reason I can really put a finger on. And so I literally Googled "how to be happy" and clicked through the links. 

The article that really drew my attention, despite not being the first on the search page, was an article by Real Simple. Gretchen Rubin writes about her "systematic study of happiness" and her 10 takeaways that helped her become happier in general. I went into the article thinking "if I can get just one to work for me, it's a start." And I found that most of what she had to say was simple tweaks that in the long run, would help. Nothing instant, no magic 30-second solution.

Now I'm not going to list them all here, but Gretchen has some really good ideas. The most helpful one for me was to let anger dissipate. If you talk about every little problem instead of letting them blow over, they make you more unhappy. I talk a lot, and a lot of it is complaining to my friends or family about how the universe is fighting against my every move. And it's okay to feel that way sometimes, but I could talk a bit less and breathe a bit more. Patience has always been a virtue that a lack, and that reflects in many things I do. 

Anyway, now that I've shared my personal takeaway, go read the article for yourself. Gretchen is an angel and I feel better already.

Be happy!

Claire

(362)

It's OK to be on your own

Apologies in advance for the plethora of clichés that I will be using throughout this post. It is about relationships, so I suppose almost every phrase I use is a cliché to some extent. Relationship clichés are just inevitable. Don't read the post if you don't like them.

When you're in high school, and you find yourself in a relationship, it can feel like the world revolves around you and that person that you are with. All that matters at the end of the day is that you've got them by your side, or texting you good night. It feels like they'll be with you forever.

Sometimes, they will be! Sometimes, that person that becomes your lab partner in Physics really does end up being your partner for life. And that's a beautiful thing. More often, things end. And that's okay, too.

This post isn't about dating, or things lasting forever, or the illusion that they will. This is just about you. Just you.

So you broke up. You are heartbroken and for the next period of time between this relationship and the next one, you will fluctuate between feeling "forever alone" and "hell yeah I love being single." This happens. When you're feeling "forever alone," go to your support system. Your mom, dad, friends, siblings, a counselor. Even silly, teenage angst is something worth talking out and being supportive of. High school is weird and strange and difficult and getting your feelings hurt sucks. Even hurting someone else's feelings sucks. And you gotta be supportive of people going through that.

Never forget who you are as an individual. You are strong, independent, and you don't need no (wo)man. Being on your own, fresh out of relationship is difficult sometimes, but it's an opportunity to remember who you are with no intentions, no flirting, no distractions. Enjoy your own company. At least give it a few days before you start chasing another (wo)man to date. Just. Take a step back and think before you panic about dying alone. It really will all work out, and you are never alone. You've got friends and family, and you will always have yourself.

Relationships and dating and romance are about being with someone who makes you happier than you thought you could be. Someone who makes you laugh, smile, and is there for you when you are crying and upset. If the person you're with doesn't make you these things, don't settle for less than you deserve. Do not ever stay in a relationship on the basis that you might not find someone else. You have to be okay on your own.

I'll close with a cliché quote. But really, if there's one thing to take away from this, it's that relationships aren't everything and you really will be okay. Even if it's on your own for a while.

“Don't compromise yourself. You're all you've got.”  - Janis Joplin

Don't sell yourself short.
Claire
(492)

Compassion? Other people's problems? What the heck to do?

It never ceases to amaze me how strong my friends are. They're brilliant, intelligent, and a lot of them have it more difficult in life than I do. 

I am, what they call a "basic white girl." Life is handed to me. Now, that's not to say I've had my share of challenges, but both my parents are alive, healthy, and happily married. My home isn't plagued by economic troubles, mental illness, or any drug issues. I'm white, and not facing much prejudice these days. My dog is young and lively, and I attend a nice school and participate in a lot of nice things. There's just not much that makes it hard for me to sleep at night. (I've got my own school work and friendship drama and occasional feelings to deal with, but that's high school, that's relationships, and that's how it is for anyone who ever leaves their house ever.)

So, that kind of sets the scene. I have a decent life. And it always hits me hard when someone mentions something going on in their life, something I haven't had to face yet, and hope I never have to. Here are some weird and difficult examples and how I survived them???...

I have anxiety. - I did my best to be mature and helpful, and understanding, but mental illnesses are complex as hell. Anxiety, depression, it's Russian roulette and only a licensed psychologist knows how to deal with this stuff. Just be there for those that are struggling with mental illness. That's a good step in the right direction.

My mom is in Arizona, and she won't be back until next year. Why, honey? She is getting treated for lyme disease. - This came from the mouth of a teary-eyed six year old. WHAT DO YOU SAY. WHAT DO YOU DO. SHES CRYING. SHIT HELP I CANNOT COMFORT HER LIKE HER MOM WOULD IVE KNOWN HER LESS THAN TWO DAYS BUT SHES HOMESICK AND HER MOM WONT BE THERE WHEN SHE GOES HOME??? HOW SERIOUS IS LYME DISEASE? WHAT DO I DOOOO. But I hugged her, and we sat in a quiet corner and I chatted her up about her favorite new movie. She wiped away her tears, and within an hour she was dancing and alive again, and I admired her resilience. A six year old.

I'm in love with her. - This guy was difficult because the feelings very clearly weren't reciprocated and he could not. let. go. Jeeeeez. Possibly one of the most difficult conversations I've had was trying to convince this dude that he will find someone just as wonderful, and that it will be okay. He was also depressed, and very adamantly shutting down any positive ideas that I suggested. He's managing now, and has lots of support, but it's really frustrating trying to help someone that throws a problem at you and then shuts down all your solutions.

These are just a couple moments where my stomach has dropped because I just have no experience with dealing with these issues. It's just more complicated than my life has gotten so far. But to people goin thru stuff - talk to someone, if it helps. Write your thoughts down if it helps. Ask for help, if you need it.
To people trying to be there for others when you can't begin to comprehend their problems - it's okay. Often, they just want to be heard. It helps. 

Life hits you like a bus when you lease expect it sometimes, and you gotta talk about it with someone or you'll be in pieces on the sidewalk.
Claire
(600)

A Double Standard of Sorts?

I lack patience. And when I'm talking to someone who I enjoy the company of, especially a boy I like, I appreciate those quick replies. It makes conversation feel less broken up. And I also strive to reply quickly. But then today, a friend of mine disappeared for eight hours. What the heck, we talk all the time, how dare you have a life outside of talking to me???? And yet the previous evening, I did the same thing, disappearing to binge watch Netflix and eat ice cream without snapchatting or messaging as much. I shouldn't complain, and yet I was still frustrated. But I know I'm not alone, I've seen plenty of whiny tweets or complaints from people about replying faster, and lord knows I favorite those tweets, because I feel that struggle too.

But sometimes, you gotta take a step back. If we all replied to each other instantly, we'd stop worrying about each other in real life, and all our communication would take place over our phones. If we don't vanish from the internet to meet up in real life every once in a while, what are we really doing? It shouldn't matter how long it takes for someone to reply to you in a text, an email, a snapchat, a DM, any of it. If you really value their time, and they value yours, if you both value the conversation being had, it doesn't matter when it stops. Because it will always start again. Even if you don't talk for a week. Two months. If one of your phones falls in a toilet, you'll email or make a better effort to get coffee weekly.

And when the conversation fizzles, it's okay. Not every person is your best friend, otherwise the term best would have no meaning anymore. Real best friends talk more over coffee or lunch than via snapchat anyway, who are we kidding. There's too many juicy things to share than you can fit in a snapchat caption, duh.

Now having written this, I will still await replies from people. It happens. But don't put too much pressure on a conversation, or a quick response. That's something our generation does, and it's just not necessary.

Stop waiting
Claire
(373)

Shady Business

A while ago, there was a post circulating around on twitter and I have some things to say, some things to get out there.


"Like this picture and I will DM you a name. You will come back to this picture and write what you think about that person in the comment. (THE TRUTH) But you will not mention their name. So the only person who knows who you are talking about is you and me"
(Photo courtesy of Twitter.)

So a few people I follow posted it. Got a bunch of favorites. But if you read through alllll the replied comments, the shady things people had to say about each other, many of them were negative. A lot of them started with a compliment or something nice, but completely insulted whoever it was at the end. "intimidating," "rubs me the wrong way," "big heart but a big head." They're all subtle, but shady as hell. Some are outright insults, too. "Total fuckboy." "kind of a bitch." You scroll through them and wonder who it is. Is it you? Your friend? A teacher? The girl sitting next to you in your third hour? Should you tell someone? Do something? Based on the terrible hunch that someone is being hurt, even though the words never reach their ears?

The concept is... juicy. Sure. And I know I'm guilty. I vent. I talk shit with no intention of my words ever reaching other people. But NO NO NO. You can't post that stuff out there for people to see and get paranoid about. Same thing goes for that After School app that was going around for a while. I downloaded it for a bit, it seemed mostly positive, but I think people got tired of it.

I'm rambling. I'll stop.

The first step to creating the #KinderKennedy that we had a full school assembly about just days before these Twitter threads surfaced, is to not throw shade and insult each other on Twitter. Honesty is great. We could all be more honest. But we could also always be more kind. And there's a balance there. If what you have to say isn't kind, or true, don't say it. 

Gossip is some dangerous shit. It's tempting. It's dangerous. And it hurts. 

Let's not do this ever again, okay Twitter? Okay.
Claire
(388)

A Letter

So in middle school, it was a common project to write a letter to yourself down the road, and the intention was to hang onto it and read it in 10 years, or at graduation. I don't know if I lost mine, or never wrote it, or never had it as an assignment, but I heard mention of it recently and decided to write myself a letter. It's not edited, not necessarily well-written, and it's pretty short, but I think it's worth preserving on here, because I will lose the hard copy someday.

Dear future Claire,

It's been a while, huh. I hope you're reading this with a steady job saving the world somehow. Maybe you're working for the peace corps, or you changed your mind and became a doctor like your dad. At the very least, you graduated from college, hopefully without too much student loan debt.

If you don't travel too much for work, maybe you'll be married with the future of kids. Have kids eventually. And send them to Camp Wapsie, and dress them well, and make them your world. That's what my parents did, and it's what you have to do as a mom.

But before you have kids, you'd better be head-over-heels in love. I mean, I'm not sure when you'll stumble upon this letter, and kids might still be a far away worry, but I hope you're in love. I hope you find someone who takes you on dates and cuddles with you and doesn't just try to get in your pants and who is just as head-over-heels for you. If you haven't found it yet though, don't stress. So many people love you and are there for you, even if you haven't found a lover for life.

Also, read books. High-schooler Claire is constantly wishing she had more time for books. Don't forget to take a step back and sit with a book. Escape to somewhere, or learn something. Always keep learning.

Another reminder - I'm not sure if you'll gain or lose weight or stay about the same, but DAMN you are beautiful. Your eyes glow and your smile shines and makeup or naked face, you are gorgeous. Tiny boobs or sexy curves, you are wonderful and super intelligent and awesome.

Finally, if you're stressed, get up and run. I'm not sure if you're still running long distance. If not, take this as a cue to get back out there! Run a half-marathon. Well, train for one. Knowing me now, you might not have kept running. Go for a run. Get outside. Soak up some sunshine on a bike or go swim or something. Never forget the wonders of the outdoors when you are caught up in life.

Anyway, that's about it. Good luck in all your endeavors. Even if these goals and pieces of advice don't line up with who you've become, you've probably achieved things far beyond my wildest dreams. No matter what, I am proud.

Love you so much,
Claire.
(500)

Parenthood

I was just talking to someone on a bus ride the other day about how whole-hearted parents are. When you have a child, you commit yourself to 18 years of caring for another human and teaching them everything for the first years of their life. You are that kid's lifeline. Also, you agree to fund their education and life and share your food with them for 18 years. Sometimes even longer. You're planting ideas in that kid's head, teaching them everything they know outside of school. It's so much commitment. I guess it just really hits you when you're getting closer to becoming an independent person, a true adult, that you owe so much to the people that raise you. And it's not always your parents alone, but the person that raises you has such an impact on who you become. Just, appreciate that for a second. The small scale I always think on is all the food that my mom and dad share with me. My mom always buys meals for me and makes sure I always get ice cream before she has a scoop. There's always milk in the fridge, food on the shelves, and my parents always serve my brother and I first. It's like always having a guest in your house. We've always been their number one priorities. Parents are so selfless.

So I guess, thank your parents? And if you want to become a parent someday, you're giving up so much. Be ready to cease to exist. All of your soul should go to your child and making them happy and successful, and I always feel fortunate that that's exactly what my parents have done for me. They focused so much energy on my brother and I, and raising us, I can't wait to make something out of all their hard work.

Be grateful
Claire

(This post is realllllllly cheesy but I wrote it with an inspiring guitar solo playing in my headphones, and I'm just never gonna go back and edit it, and it'll stay preserved as this nice, uplifting, and very cheesy post. Which is how it should be. Parents work hella hard and we shouldn't forget it.)

(365)

Embarrassment

A creative post about a mortifying moment on a mundane Monday.

Puddle claire seeps through cracks in the sidewalks and disappears for eternity, to flow through the cycle that water travels in. 

First to the ground water, then pulled up in a well, used as irrigation water for crops, becoming runoff, to a stream, to a river, to an ocean. 

Puddle claire takes to the sky, to sail as a light and happy, yet still terribly embarrassed cloud, carefree and happy but for a few utterly mortifying moments. 

Puddle claire is then carried by the wind to gather over a small town in eastern Iowa, concentrating as a rainstorm, and then bursting forth as droplets to precipitate down. 

Sheltered from the downpour, another little human being. 

Someone embarrassed about some trivial mistake they made. 

Sad about something heart-crushingly awful. 

Angry, so angry they can’t stop the hot tears that flow. 

They too melt into a puddle being, joining claire via the toilet system, runoff down a sidewalk, or perhaps tears into a sink. 

Whatever it is, we all melt a little sometimes, and we get embarrassed and upset and hurt by stuff. 

Life is a steamy kitchen, fire burning stoves and hair-singing heat. And life makes us melt. 

But what we forget is that somewhere along the way in this cycle, this cycle where we and our emotions melt us into something we are not, we come back as a stronger human being. 

The droplets collect in a puddle on the sidewalk, and claire emerges once again, a human being, a wonderful, inspired, weightlessly free person, happy to be who she is and no longer embarrassed or sad or angry. 

Her water molecules are stronger now, and they take more heat to melt. 

This is what we do.

It was just a sort of rough start back into the week. Long practices, difficult classes, it all happens. And I often joke with my friends about how I'm embarrassed and I've just melted on the spot. In the moment, I continued with the metaphor and just kept typing, and it turned into something kind of cool, something worth posting here.

It's okay to melt sometimes.

Claire

(365)

Yolo?

You know how in high school, everyone goes through some phases? At least on some level...

There's a period of bliss, (freshman year) where you've made it to high school and classes are fun and friendships are simple and easy and everyone loves everyone. This one is nice. Everyone is innocent, and discovering the newfound independence of being labeled a high schooler. Everything is new and exciting because you're doing it as a high schooler. Going bowling is cool. Dates are still awkward. But you're in high school. So they're legit.

Then there's an era filled with drama and friendship fallouts and absolute disasters (sophomore year). Spring break tears apart your primary friendship, and all your other friends get awkward, and you have an identity crisis and worry that you'll spend the rest of your high school career floating between social groups, drifting, without friends, and with no weekend plans forever. This phase passes.

The next phase, (junior year) so far, is kind of like the first. You have to recover from the wreckage of the drama, but when the smoke clears, the friends remaining are the most bomb ass friends you could ever picture yourself having, and you have grown into a more tolerant, mature person that resolves the same issues as the previous phase, but with a text message, a short talk, or letting each other cool off, instead of yelling and crying. 

(I'm not really sure what senior year will be like as a "phase," but junior year has been the most mature and nice of the three so far.) 

Everyone is busy and we all coexist nicely. We tick each other off sometimes, but we have separate interests and issues and we spend a lot more time helping each other out. We're becoming individuals, and junior year becomes a time for discovering ourselves. I guess senior year is the decision making year. (pick a school / major / career pathway) It's interesting to see each other grow and change and truly become young adults. 

My advice to anyone entering that fateful sophomore year is that it will be okay. The friends we make in high school aren't necessarily the friends we have in college. They could be, but nothing is forever, and that dumb fight over one person texting another person's crush, is actually trivial nonsense. Almost a year has gone by since that painful spring break trip, and any time someone brings up the Disney orchestra trip of spring, 2015, there's always a cause for laughter. Remember when everyone was sunburnt and we spent $15 on a tube of aloe vera for our hotel room? Remember when we gave each other the silent treatment on the 18 hour bus ride home? When we cried in the hotel hallway and thought we had made up our friendship but continued fighting? So glad that's behind us...

And it is. I know there's plenty of junior year still ahead of us, but here's to senior year. Junior year has been so awesome, and I've grown so much. Senior year is going to be full of wonderful lasts, and a lot of terrifying firsts, and I couldn't be more unprepared.

Yolo? (if that's still a hip thing that the kids say)

Claire

New Hampshire Primaries

Well, Iowa is no longer in the political spotlight. The New Hampshire primaries are approaching, and I'm personally rooting for Marco Rubio to make a comeback on the Republican side and bump Donald Trump down one place, but where Republican support lies is a total crapshoot. Polls have shown that Trump is trending in New Hampshire, but the candidates are all so spontaneous and unpredictable, and their voters are just as unpredictable. I'm excited to see what happens.

On the Democrats' side, Bernie Sanders will probably win. And based on the rumors I've heard from a few of my more liberal peers, Bernie Sanders will win by a lot. Lots of liberal supporters out east...  We'll see what happens, I guess!!

Anyway, I'm just really excited. We'll see how it goes, I'm tuning in via the new snapchat filters that you can refresh to show the latest polls. It's exciting to follow the heated political stuff that's happening this year, because I can truly understand a lot of what is going on and I feel educated enough to form some opinions of my own.

Get informed and vote this election season guys!
Claire

(200)

Iowa Caucuses Part 3

(read my last post before this one, it's kind of the second half of a weird adventure.)

My mom says I'm still totally welcome at the democratic caucus if I want to observe. We're almost home, but dad makes a u-turn and takes me to Viola Gibson to watch the Democratic caucus. 

I arrive in the cafeteria just as they have determined that Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders are viable, but those supporting Martin O'Malley will not be viable. The people running the caucus announce a short break for each side to try to sway those siding with O'Malley, and the three or four people standing in the O'Malley corner disperse to join Hillary and Bernie's sides. The cafeteria is filled with a dull rumble of chatter between supporters, and after about 10 minutes, it gets quiet and no one is changing sides. 

The guy with the microphone asks for one person from each candidate to count heads and report numbers and they will total the votes and make sure there aren't any counting errors. It's so peaceful and organized, and as I watch them count heads, I pick out nearly a dozen familiar faces just from my school, seniors, young voters. I saw some neighbors caucusing for Hillary. It was refreshing to see democracy in action, and comforting to see people I knew after having been surrounded by 3000+ complete strangers downtown at the republican caucus. 

The democrats were done in less than an hour total. The guy pulls out a calculator, and the sides add up to the original total of voters present. 
"Okay folks, that's it. Thank you for coming and participating." Everyone stands up and shuffles out of the cafeteria. My mom and I make it home by 8:00.

So, that was my caucus experience. In a way, I got to see a little bit of both sides of the Iowa caucuses, and I definitely preferred the relaxed democrats. Yet, when casting a secret ballot at a republican caucus, no one tries to sway you to change your position, and your vote goes to your candidate. The results from a republican caucus are probably more accurate for that reason. 

I was mostly just excited to take part in the process and observe. I'm proud of my state. We're the first to determine the front runners in the presidential election, and I felt special for living here. Go Iowa. Corn and caucuses. And good people.

It's still quite early in the voting season, and I am excited to see who is elected in the fall. If there's one valuable takeaway from the Iowa caucuses of 2016, at least Trump didn't win.
(He came in second in the republican caucuses.)

Happy voting season, Iowa. You shined this week.
Claire
(462)

Iowa Caucuses Part 2

So I went. My dad and I went downtown to the Double Tree hotel to weave through a crowded lobby and find the voter registration table to he could become a republican and cast his secret ballot for whichever Republican candidate he wanted to support. I just knew it wasn't Donald Trump or Ted Cruz. He wouldn't tell me. We got there an hour before the caucus began so we had plenty of time to find seats and sign in and stuff. Two guys tell us that he can fill out the registration form at his chair and someone will collect it and bring him a ballot. 

Easy. Nice. We sit down. I'm reading. And then at 6:45, with 15 minutes until the caucus starts, someone walks up to the microphone and announces that you have to go to a table for your precinct to sign in and get a ballot. We had been misled by two different people and had sat quietly for half and hour, along with about 500 other people, who also stand up and make a beeline for the door from the conference hall back to the hallway. 500 people to fight through just for a ballot. My dad hadn't eaten dinner and he had seen so many posters for candidates other than his that he gave up, right then and there. 

"We're going home. I know I'm not being a great parent right now, but I'm hungry and I'm tired and at this rate we won't get out of here until 11 pm. Come on, you've got homework. Let's go." I was disappointed to say the least. We shuffle out of the grand hotel, past Ted Cruz, chatting with starry-eyed voters.

Now don't get me wrong. For all the people voting for the popular republican candidates, that must have been a very exciting night. Ted Cruz was there! Wow!

But when you don't idolize the people being supported, it's not fun. My dad was really upset by the lack of organization. On the way home, we are listening to the radio. People across the state were calling in to echo my dad's concerns. There was a HUGE turnout for the Iowa caucuses this year, and I'm not old enough to participate. And of course I didn't get to even go observe the process on either side. This is history being made, and I missed it because my dad was hungry. We're almost home when mom finally texts back. She's at Viola Gibson Elementary for the democratic caucus.

Maybe there's still time...
Claire
(427)

Bruegger's Bagels

Today, I had a reunion with one of my favorite people on the planet. I spent four HOURS sitting in Bruegger's Bagels talking to my camp counselor, Jordy Brown. He recently returned from spending five months student teaching at the American School of Dubai, and he arranged a meeting for all of his past Leaders in Training to join him at Bruegger's for the afternoon and catch up. He asked us about life, and shared stories all about his immersion in Dubai. He shared some interesting adventures...

First, he had never been the minority before. He was an average, Caucasian boy in a mostly Caucasian Iowa. Five months in Dubai made him realize what it's like to be one of the few people who doesn't speak the language. He learned about the food they eat, the economic corruption that is so tangibly present in the city, and he learned to ride on one of those funky handle-free segways that has been inaccurately nicknamed a "hoverboard."

I can't even begin to summarize all the things he shared with us, all the stories about teaching and the culture in Dubai. But it was really really fun to catch up with him. Anyone interested in traveling the world, or student teaching, or both, should check out his blog. He's a great teacher, counselor, and friend. When I read his blog, I can hear him speaking, and based on what he blogs about, he has a pretty bright future as a teacher.

Yep, that's all.
Claire

(Seriously, check out his blog, though. It's riiiight here.)
(261)

Iowa Caucuses

Last time I went to a caucus, I was 7 years old. I don't really remember it, honestly. Apparently everyone packed into the Viola Gibson Elementary school cafeteria, and other precincts did the same thing across the state. My mom caucused for Obama, I think. And now, it's time again. This upcoming Monday, people will caucus again for the next presidential candidates in this fall's election. There's going to be a huge Republican caucus downtown that concentrates all the precincts, but the Democrats split theirs up more regionally so it's easier to count where people side. 

My mom is caucusing with the Democrats. I think she'll caucus for Hillary Clinton, but I'm not entirely sure. She'll be in the Viola Gibson cafeteria again, and apparently they split up and sit on the side or in the corner representing who they are siding with. I really can't picture what it looked like all those years ago.

My dad wants to go to the big, crowded Republican one downtown. He won't tell me who he's caucusing for, maybe because he hasn't decided. But the Republicans select spokespersons for candidates to sway people to vote for candidates, and then everyone submits a secret ballot with their vote. There are a lot more Republican candidates and I'm excited to go to the Republican caucus and see what it's like. 

Going into this exciting evening for Iowa, my only hope is that Donald Trump doesn't win. He's not the right man for this presidency, and if he doesn't win in Iowa, it will be a hit to his ego in other states' primaries.

As for the democrats, I think anyone up for election will do a decent job. All three candidates have good ideas and will lead the country well if elected. I think it would be exciting to see the first female president elected to office, but the nation has to decide that Hillary Clinton truly deserves to be that woman.

So, to close this, make sure you get out and caucus! We're the first state that gets a say in who leads our nation, and our caucus results impact who stays and who goes and sets an example for the rest of America.

Best of luck to everyone! (except Donald)

Claire

(380)

Michael Scott

A quick forewarning: this blog post revolves around a character from The Office, and if you haven't made it through Season 7, it may or may not ruin the entire show for you. So, stop reading, I guess? Check out this link instead!

For the rest of you that are familiar with Michael Scott, you are aware of what a character he is. The Office is a show about a regional branch of a paper company. It takes place mostly in the paper sales office, and the plot-line consists of interactions between all of the people working there. Michael is the regional manager, the guy in charge of the branch. And man, he's such an idiot! (I say this adoringly, he turns out to be a great character.) The show revolves mostly around Michael screwing something up or offending someone, and the entire office trying to undo the damages. His love life is a mess and he has no financial knowledge, and he's always insulting his employees and making terrible decisions on behalf of the entire staff of Dunder-Mifflin.

However, he's not the only one risking the well-being of the staff. Dwight is a handful, and Andy and Kevin make their fair share of mistakes as well. But the biggest issues usually lead back to Michael. On rare occasions - small, five second clips, perhaps - you might see him actually make a good decision, or have one smart comment. But the show mostly highlights his stupidity.

And then, he leaves. Near the end of season 7, he finally falls in love with the perfect dork to balance him out, and he gets engaged with her and moves to Colorado so she can take care of her parents. Holly and Michael are adorable, yes. Finally, Michael can settle down and start a family. But in that last episode before he leaves, he says goodbye to everyone without them realizing it. He told the entire office that he doesn't leave until the next day, but in reality he will board a plane that evening. Only Jim picks up on this, and only Jim and Pam truly get to say goodbye. After 15 years of dedicated work at a small paper business, Michael is leaving. And somehow, there are 3 more seasons without Michael. I can't stand it. He's integral to the show. And it's that final episode that really hits home...

He brings so much more than his disastrous decisions to the office. He brings humor, love, and he makes the office fun, even when he takes it too far. He creates the plot-line of the office. And at the end of the day, he is a brilliant leader and loyal friend. He considers his employees to be his best friends and practically family, and does his best to make that clear and take care of them even when they don't reciprocate.

So, as I sat there in my pajamas, sobbing as Michael hugs Pam in the airport terminal, that was when I truly appreciated the character of Michael Gary Scott. He surprised everyone on that show, and everyone watching. I am hopeful that he returns to the show later, because it feels like there is a gap without him there. 

Even the most unlikely people can become great leaders, and everyone has an important role in the world. I'll close this post with a quote from Michael.

"You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. -Wayne Gretzky" 
-Michael Scott.

That is all. Whatever you do, be a leader and take chances. Michael Scott can't teach us much, but he taught me to be more daring. A truly inspiring fictional character.

Claire
(610)

Sasha (and a conclusion)

Last but never least, is Sasha. She’s the “mom” of the LITs and she holds everything together. She helps everyone get along and solves our conflicts. She’s also not afraid to be really strict, even with her own peers. What would normally come off as a really stern comment, she always manages to make humorous. She’s is a great actress, and uses jokes to make what she has to say helpful without being rude. It sounds edgy, but she pulls it off really well. She doesn’t have the time or patience for people messing around and getting off-task, and her well-timed comments and sarcasm are really helpful. Her kitchen dish washing crew was one of the fastest to get done, probably because she organized everyone in a sort of assembly line fashion. Just, thank goodness for Sasha. She ties up loose ends and has a sassy attitude that actually helps keep everything and every person under control.

And to wrap this up, thanks to all the great leaders I got to work with this summer. These posts are sappy and sort of repetitive because I love them all so much, but they’re really sweet people and quality friends. If I could close this little intermittent blog series with a more general piece of advice, it would be to find friends as amazing as the ones I made. They are smart, witty, passionate, and loyal people and I appreciate everything they taught me and continue to teach me. Because we were all plucked from different school districts, cities, even states, and different backgrounds and social groups, we are a diverse group of people that bring a lot of different stories and qualities to the table. That’s important, and it’s what makes them so much fun to hang out with. They all make me laugh and make me think differently. Surround yourself with people who do that. It’s pretty fun.

Stay cool, kids.

Claire

(P.S. I'm experimenting with different blog endings, I guess? I don't like sticking to one phrase. So, don't judge me by my closing words, please and thank you.)

(351)

Nathan

Nathan is so chill, dawg. He is a very down-to-earth, kind person that provides surprisingly wise advice, for a fifteen year old. I remember he said "chill, dawg," on the second day I had known him, and everyone in the room cracked up because we didn't think those words could sensible enter someone's vocabulary. And yet, Nathan said things were "chill" all the time, and provided our "fam" with some solid advice. He liked to ask really profound questions about the universe just to confuse and irritate us. But we always sat and talked about them for a solid hour, anyway. He's good at starting some pretty good conversations.

These conversational skills helped around campers because he could always ask them a really weird question off the top of his head, and get them talking. If a kid was homesick, he'd distract them by asking them about their favorite season, and why they liked it. Around older campers, this gave him a cooler vibe. Everyone liked to talk to him and think out loud around him. And when you are closer friends with him, he provides really good relationship advice. He's a very thoughtful person, I guess. I'd just leave it at that. I won't overthink this blog too much. I can leave that up to Nathan. He'll probably tie it into constellations and the universe somehow, and somehow it will still make sense. 

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

In the wise words of Nathan, "stay chill, fam."

Claire

(270)

A Lesson In Ramen Noodles

Trust me, this totally ties back to an important life lesson, and is totally related to bettering yourself as a person...

As I sit down to type this, I also sit down to taste the most hellish stir-fry that has ever been created. I'm home alone for dinner, and was going to reheat some leftover ramen noodles in the microwave. I decided to google some ideas on how to make leftover ramen more classy, or turn it into something more fun to eat. I stumbled across a handful of articles and recipes on how to create fried ramen batter, turn it into a pizza crust, and how to stir-fry it with assorted veggies and meat. I decided to try a stir-fry. Except I'm working with leftovers, so the ratios are completely off, and I've never tried to stir-fry anything before.

So let's see. I beat an egg, drain the broth from my ramen, and mix the noodles in with the egg in a bowl. I put a tablespoon of oil and a pat of butter in a pan and turn on the stove. I add my noodles. So far, so good. It's cooking! Maybe this will work.

It starts well. And then I try to flip the egg and noodle fry, to cook the other side. The skillet is too small and it folds inwards. It's fine. It's an egg and noodle scramble I guess. It's all good. I'll add meat and cheese, preferably some chicken and cheese.

I opt for sliced salomi and some cut up string cheese, which doesn't go well. Aha! Maybe the cheese will melt if I steam it!

Shit. Now it's soggy. *sigh*

What's the takeaway from this disgusting, soggy, stir-fry?

Some things are better left as is, straight up, with no fireworks or confetti. It's okay to stick to the basics sometimes.

Also, I SUCK at cooking. Should've just used the microwave...

Good luck in all your ramen adventures,
Claire
(330)

Hannah

Hannah is one of the LITs that made it into my CIT session next summer, and for good reason. She’s so nice to all the kids and really good at managing them without ever being forced to raise her voice. They respect her and trust her. She has also proven that she deserves this position as a CIT because she is so friendly and easy to talk to. A good sense of humor and enthusiasm go a long way in childcare, and she had both of those, making her one of the best LITs and future counselors I’ve ever met. 

Aside from this, Hannah is also hard-working and was willing to let others enjoy themselves while she worked hard. She volunteered to play with day campers in the afternoon and entertain even the most difficult and poorly behaved young ones, even though it was scheduled as her free afternoon. I’m really excited to have her in my CIT session, because I know at least one of the people I’ll be in a cabin with for four weeks.

So, yeah. Hannah's cool. I don't know what else to say. I'm gonna just tie up this blog and move on because I have a few more LITs to write about and I want to finish acknowledging them all this week.

Happy Tuesday, y'all!

Claire

(250)